Convent – a place of retirement for women who wish for leisure to meditate upon the sin of idleness.
Day n. A period of twenty-four hours mostly misspent.
Academe n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy n.: A modern school where football is taught.
Land: A part of the earth’s surface considered as property. The theory that land is property subject to private ownership and control is the foundation of modern society and is eminently worthy of the superstructure.
Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house and plans a draft of your money.
Sweater n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
Marriage n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master a mistress and two slaves making in all two.