I think Mr. Wilson will have to be the rest of the way alone.
You can’t expect to hit the jackpot if you don’t put a few nickels in the machine.
Get well cards have become so humorous that if you don’t get sick you’re missing half the fun.
Funny is an attitude.
My happiest memory of childhood was my first birthday in reform school. This teacher took an interest in me. In fact he gave me the first birthday presents I ever got: a box of Cracker Jacks and a can of ABC shoe polish.
Funny is not a color. Being black is only good from the time you get from the curtain to the microphone.
My main point is to be funny if I can slip a message in there fine.
Things can be funny only when we are in fun. When we’re ‘dead earnest’ humor is the only thing that is dead.